The Four Agreements By Don Miguel Ruiz
I was insecure. The more I ran for peace of mind, the further it seems to get away from me. I was being dragged down by my own overthinking. I had no idea on what to do next. I started searching and came across meditation, yoga, some therapies, and a lot of things. I did try them but I wasn’t getting better anytime soon. Do you sometimes find it hard to get out of the entangled thoughts as well?
“If you live in a past dream, you don’t enjoy what is happening right now because you will always wish it to be different than it is. There is no time to miss anyone or anything because you are alive. Not enjoying what is happening right now is living in the past and being only half alive. This leads to self pity, suffering and tears.”
― Don Miguel Ruiz
I was never a bright student. I was mediocre and I knew it. I didn’t even care about it at all. But people do. All the people around us intentionally or unintentionally affect us in certain way. I got affected by negative opinions a lot. I was trying to escape reality and live in my own comfort zone. But I knew it wasn’t doing good to me. I didn’t know how to get better equipped with my own insecurities.
As I was dwindling deeper into overthinking, it started getting noticed in school as well. One day, one of my school teachers asked me if there was something wrong because I wasn’t performing well in the subject and my grades were dropping. I was hesitant to confront my own problem and not that I was much aware of what’s wrong either. So I just gave a vague answer. She told me how I was always being distracted in the class and then she gave me this book “The Four Agreements”. I gladly accepted it without being sure if I was going to read it or not. It turned out to be really really helpful and I ended up thanking her and expressing gratitude for her kind gesture.
“Wherever you go you will find people lying to you, and as your awareness grows, you will notice that you also lie to yourself. Do not expect people to tell you the truth because they also lie to themselves. You have to trust yourself and choose to believe or not to believe what someone says to you.”
― Don Miguel Ruiz
This book taught me a lot about coping up with the extremities, handling pressure, insecurities and about peace of mind. I felt really refreshed after having read this book. I was judging myself a lot for all major and minor things in life. It’s important to be responsible and take action to keep improving ourselves day by day but we shouldn’t be judging ourselves for the same. We can still be responsible and take accountability for our actions from a place of self-love.
We set so many expectations from ourselves that we end up revolving our lives around them. It doesn’t just give the power of our self-esteem to someone or something but also makes us suffer for it. Life’s about fighting with all the problems with intense energy but with a peaceful mind. We need to focus more on acceptance rather than arguments, forgiveness instead of vengeance and living with more positivity and love. We need to control our minds because if we let our minds control us. But everything starts small. This book will help you to discover your true self and let go of the image you have created in your minds out of expectations from others.
BOOK POINTERS
Self Love — It’s important to be responsible for our actions, but not by beating ourselves up. We need to stop judging ourselves at every step and start loving ourselves more. Self love helps us in acceptance and understanding ourselves better.
Objective Opinions — We have a tendency to take things personally and attach our self worth with them. What people say reflects them, not us. Taking thins objectively allows us trust ourselves more and helps us in defining our life.
Assumptions — Assumptions are invisible expectations that we set in our minds. One of the main reasons why we suffer is because we expect a lot out of people. Let things happen and don’t assume before the outcome.
Do Your Best — Always give your best. Judging yourself to others will make you feel insecure and as if you haven’t accomplished anything. Just give your personal best without letting anyone’s opinions get to you.
Inner Warrior — The war can also be fought mentality. We all have gone through a lot. If we keep carrying the wounds, they will keep hurting us. Start cleaning the emotional wounds and loving yourself as well as the others.
“The big difference between a warrior and a victim is that the victim represses and the warrior refrains.”
― Don Miguel Ruiz
Forgive — Forgive people. Forgive the ones who hurt you in the past. It’s not about how terrible it was and how much it affected you. It’s about our lives. And we deserve to live in peace and harmony.
What I Learned From The Book
Life is simple. We make it complicated. It’s about forgiving, self acceptance and spreading more love and peace to the world.
CONCLUSION
I have learned a lot about emotional health from this book. I would strongly recommend this book to anyone who is suffering from anxiety, overthinking and stress. This book will help you understand why and how to love ourselves and not let opinions and judgement get in our way. It will change the way we think about mental health.
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